Tag Archives: Christ

Thinking of You Again

Dear Caleb, Hey there little man.  How is heaven treating you?  I know, I know, it is silly of me to ask such a crazy question.  You are hanging out with God what can be more awesome than that?  As for us, mommy, your brothers and sister and I are all doing really well.  I have not checked in with you in while but that is because I figured you have a whole lot better things to do then to keep coming back down here to comfort me.  I was talking to a gentleman the other day about you and he gave me some really good insight on letting you go so that you could just enjoy your time in heaven.  I took heed of this advice, so we will see where it leads me. Last night we were at dinner with a friend, we shared your story with them.  Once again it got me thinking of you.  I showed them the picture of you staring up at God during the Easter party the year you died.  I realized then how much I truly still hurt inside because of you being gone.  There will always be a part of my heart that is dedicated to you, and these letters are an extension of my heart. One thing I can rest on though, I know one day I will be in heaven with you and I am gonna give you a super hug, you know like the ones we used to give each other.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake,


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Posted by on February 9, 2015 in Letters to Caleb


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Deuteronomy 30:16 GNB

(16) “If you obey the commands of the Lord your God, which I give you today, if you love him, obey him, and keep all his laws, then you will prosper and become a nation of many people.  The Lord your God will bless you in the land that you are about to occupy.”

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Posted by on February 9, 2015 in Daily Inspiration


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Good Direction


There will come a day in your grief when you think that you have finally overcome.  A day when you think that all is well.  A day when you think that you are finally rising through the ashes.  Only to find that you are simply having a great day in grief.  Embrace days like this and build on them.  The grass is truly greener on the other side.

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Posted by on February 8, 2015 in After the Ashes


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Hebrews 4:12 KJV

(12)”For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

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Posted by on February 8, 2015 in Daily Inspiration


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Can You Tell Me Why?


“There is a candle burning brightly for you here son. every night at the dinner table we light it. It helps us to to remember you forever.”

We use symbols to remember the loved ones that has passed before us. Why is it that we do that? That is the million dollar question for the day. Aren’t our memories good enought to honor those that have fallen? I know for myself that it gives me a feeeling of comfort. However, is there a degree of unhealthy to it. The simple fact that instead of moving foward with our lives we attach the past to something and dwell on it. This act never really allows us to process our emotions of letting go.

Consider this a healthy debate. If you have opposite feelings of this please feel frre to comment below. I would love to hear your thoughts.

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Posted by on February 3, 2015 in After the Ashes


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Psalms 5:11-12 NIV

(11)”But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy.  Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you.”  (12)”Surely, Lord, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield.

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Posted by on February 3, 2015 in Daily Inspiration


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I Saved Him!

In order for this story to make sense please read this post first.  About Caleb

So there I was….  Sleeping soundly in my bed last night.  I slipped off into dreamland.  I was taken back to the day that Caleb passed.  Everything was just as it was on that day.  I was in the yard fixing the bicycle tire.  For some reason I was able to complete the job all the way.  I had the tire pump and everything. I knew at that point this dream was taking on a different storyline,  which seemed kinda weird. Suddenly I heard a splash in the pool. My wife was standing on the pool deck yelling.  I raced up to see what was going on. She got out of the water she said that she could not find him. In a mad panic I jumped into the water, I felt something under my foot.  I realized that it was my little boy Caleb.  I reached down and grabbed ahold of him and pulled him up.  Once I got him to the surface, I realized that he was alive.  There was only one difference this time.  He was all grown up!  I would say that he was around 6 or 7 years old. That dream snapped me back to reality.  I awoke in my bed to my little Noah screaming,  but something was different.  I felt a presence out in the hallway.  It was a very loving presence and the hallway seemed to be very bright.  Noah was screaming in a manner that knew something was different with him this time.  My wife brought him back to bed with us where we were able to calm him down and get him back to sleep.  After all of this commotion was over I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of my chest.  Caleb stopped by to tell us that he was okay and we did not need to be sad anymore.  I love when he visits us like that.  Has any of you ever had anything like that happen before?

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Posted by on February 2, 2015 in After the Ashes


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1 John 2:15-16 NIV

(15)”Do not love the world or anything in the world.  If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them.” (16)”For everything in the world – the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life – comes not from the Father but from the world.”

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Posted by on February 2, 2015 in Daily Inspiration


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Be Careful

Good morning son.  I woke up thinking about you this morning.  All I know is that I really, really miss you.  When I die the first person I am gonna look for in Heaven is you.  You can count on it.  Pretty soon your bubby will be coming to stay with us.  You love him so much.  in fact you were looking forward to seeing him again.  Wait a minute.  I just realized that you can go see him anytime that you want to.  The best part about it is that you don’t have to set through that boring old car ride all the way to Kansas.  No you get to do something so much better.  You can spread those wings of yours and fly.

Well today is Friday.  That means it is the end to another week at work.  I can come home tonight and spend all weekend with you, mommy and sissy.  I can finally get some much-needed rest.  I hate to change subject on you so quickly but something has been bugging me since the day that you died.  I feel like God was mad at me for how hard I was on you.  The way that I used to yell at you.  The way that I used to whip your butt.  The way that I made you set at the table and eat your food.  How I kept you in your bedroom most of the time so that you would not tear up the house.  I know that I was doing these things out of love for you, but I cannot help to think about it.  Maybe if I was a little more easy-going on you things would not be the way they are.  I am left with that burning question in my mind.  

God I know that you are reading this to.  Will you please give my family and I strength today.  Just continue to build strength back up in us so that we can be at full strength one day.  It is still very hard to do a lot of things, to get back into the routine.  It seems as if we start to gain a little momentum , then we have a setback.  Lord we need you now more than ever.  Oh yeah I just wanted to thank you for having little Autumn to remind us to pray at night before we eat.  All of these things I pray in the name of your wonderful son Jesus.  Amen.

Well bubby that time has come again.  Work.  Now I want you to listen to me.  If you come to work with me today I want you to be safe.  I saw you in some pretty weird places yesterday.  If you were here doing those things in person I would tan your little hyde.  I know you are an angel now but I am still your father and I would like it if you were to be careful.

I love you like a fat kid loves cake,


To my readers

It may seen a little strange, but I seen this boy standing on top of a stack of wood yesterday at work.  I could almost hear him say “daddy look.”  My family and I love little Caleb so much.  He truly is our little Angel now.


Posted by on May 20, 2011 in Letters to Caleb


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